How We Teach People How To Treat Us

“You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce.”

Tony Gaskins

Believe it or not, we actually hold the key to shape the way we are treated and spoken to by others. Many people don’t realize that we do in fact have this power and that when we work on our self esteem and realize the ways we do in fact teach people how to treat us. We get to choose what we will tolerate, what we won’t tolerate and what behaviour we reward and reinforce. Kind of like Pavlov’s dog, we actually have the ability to TRAIN people and teach them what behaviours and ways of treating us are acceptable, and what aren’t!

Do you find sometimes that people don’t treat you well or the way you’d like them to? 

The truth is, everything starts with our own relationship to ourselves: our self esteem and the way in which we feel about ourselves and this sets the standard to the way others treat us. People are never able to treat us badly if we are firm and strong within our own beliefs of self. Only when we allow others either consciously or unconsciously to treat us poorly, are they able to.


The universe responds to the vibration we put out… 

When we think negatively, we will constantly receive negativity. When we think positively, we will be able to receive positivity. 

Ask yourself this:

If you’re not honouring yourself, how can anyone honour you? If you’re not respecting yourself, how can anyone respect you? If you’re not loving yourself, how can anyone love you? 

These following questions are good check ins to see your relationship with yourself:

  • What ways do you think will help you to improve your relationship with yourself to set the standard for the way you are treated by others?
  • How do you take care of yourself?
  • How do you honour yourself regularly?
  • How do you connect to yourself?
  • How do you work on your self esteem?
  • How do you stand up for yourself?
  • How do you show up for yourself?
  • How do you express yourself?
Annie Spratt

I feel we all need to take responsibility for our own self sabotage (which we are all guilty of sometimes), that will only mirror in our everyday lives with the people we meet and the relationships and experiences we have. 

How we feel about ourselves and treat ourselves are constantly reflecting in every single situation life throws at us. If we think low of ourselves, of course we are only going to attract people who think we are less than and are looking to treat us poorly. Let’s start with number one (YOU) and help you find a better reflection of thinking high of yourself to attract people who think highly of you. That doesn’t automatically mean that everyone will treat us well. There will still be people who try to bring us down, but with this higher self esteem and ascended vibration, we will be able to communicate when people cross our boundaries and teach others how we would like to be treated.

Not everyone is worth being in your life!

I kindly invite you to: Love yourself, nourish yourself, respect yourself, be kind to yourself, cherish yourself and change your perspective!

This is the place where you will start to see changes in your life and everything around you! It’s not an easy practice, but nothing worthwhile in this life ever is!

If you would like to learn more about how to raise your vibration and heighten your self esteem. Let’s work together! I offer both psychotherapy and spiritual transformation coaching to help you better align with yourself!

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